Marriage Couples Need Equal Time

Stop Talking About Yourself

We are all to some degree people who talk about ourselves and in small quantities that’s not a bad thing; but and there always seems to be a but. But if ones going to be successful in life, you need to exercise restraint when putting the spot light on yourself all the time. And I’m sure you can find these people in your life, if you give it a little thought. One of our next-door neighbors in Michigan was in our opinion the number one winner for talking about herself. And it never mattered what the topic of conversation was about, from her perspective only she existed.

Couldn't Take the Focus Off Herself

During the summer months we enjoyed cooking outside and just sitting around and sharing thoughts about things and ideas we had about the future etc. Our patio configuration was located on cement and probably twenty feet from the fence that divided us and are neighbor. Even while sitting out there we would constantly hear her talking from her me position on life. Sometime when company would share our patio with us they would first hand learn the art of talking only about yourself via our neighbor. And it was so obvious we didn’t even have to point it out.

She Controlled the Conversation

I often wondered how that behavior affected her husband and two children. I never did get to know her husband and children because they hardly ever spoke a word in my presence. The only small sharing of information was when the Mother wasn’t home. All other times she was like a person who didn’t want her family members to say anything. When they worked in the yard she was the supervisor and pointed out every leave to rake and every speck of grass to mow.

Head Stone Said Me

I feel kind of bad about only pointing out her bad behavior and not the good things she did. But I’m not sure what else she thought about in life except about herself and that’s a poor wording to put on your tombstone.

Only Dying Stopped Her Voice

Then one day she developed a clot in her brain and she passed away. Only death managed to stop her from focusing all her thoughts on herself. I wish I could say we shared good conversation and learned from each other, but that wasn’t possible because the line of communication only went one way and that was from her outward. I wonder if she learned this behavior by watching someone else?

Share Talking Time

There’s a lesson to be learned here, but I think I’ll stop writing and give you a chance to talk. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Don L. Terrill
The Marriage Guru

photo by wrestlingentropy