A Good Marriage Needs Alone Time

Sometimes We Just Need to Hide

What method couples use to support their family is up to them. But know matter what your arrangement is, both parties to this children raising activity need time away from their children, to help keep their wellness going and there connection with the real world. Having the total responsibility of raising the children and not finding time for your own personal growth is definitely harmful thing for most people. I have known Mothers who won’t have it any other way and they love it, and all there growth needs are being fulfilled doing the child-rearing thing. I in my humble opinion and through my observations have concluded that such individuals are rare and shouldn’t be the pattern for most Mothers. Were all humans and as such need activities that help to promote are personal growth and makes us better partners and parents because of it.

The Doer Needs the Most Down Time

All too often one and that’s generally the Mother, is given all the burden of raising the children and only receives minor help from their spouse. Yes this process works well for the one doing less of the child stuff, but it devastating for the spouse carrying most of the load. And even after an unfortunate divorce one spouse generally carries most of the child rearing responsibilities and the other parent is the fun person and that confuses the children because they wonder why the parent they live with is so controlling and the other is always a fun person, when there with them. That’s a know brainier, one is training the children for life and the other is just having fun with them and leaves the instruction rearing to the other x person. Sure it’s easy to be the good person, when you’re not in charge.

Find Time or Lose Yourself

If your raising your children all the time and not getting help from your spouse, your probable in real jeopardy of loosing your sense of continuity and may required a serious talk to yourself in the mirror. You and your children need help and I include the children because stressful parents aren’t good role models and need personal help to keep their sanity in check.

Don't Forget Who You Are

Ignoring the truth of what I am telling you will only make the situation you’re in more difficult and harder to handle in the future. Your children are your greatest responsibility and that requires that you use your resources wisely and always realize time alone for yourself is required and shouldn’t be the thing you do, only if you can find time for it. Make time and be selfish because if you don’t the price you’ll pay will be more then you and your children can handle. That’s my feeling and I’m sticking to it.

Don L. Terrill
The Marriage Guru

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